J.D. Nelson

The Good News Dumpsters of Chicago


BLAB-OON IN A TEST TUBE: This is some first-rate carrot cake!

DUNGAREE CLYDE: Mirror plaid -- the lyre is smelty.

BLAB-OON IN A TEST TUBE: I'd be better off if I were a potted plant.

DUNGAREE CLYDE: Butter nuff ye scone!

BLAB-OON IN A TEST TUBE: Ask for crackers & a lantern.

DUNGAREE CLYDE: I ain't jokely -- ching wooze alumna.

BLAB-OON IN A TEST TUBE: Whose nuts are in this dish?

DUNGAREE CLYDE: You deserve a snake today.

*******

(haiku)


drifting off to sleep
I jump straight up out of bed --
spider on my nuts

*********

Later, at Feeney's


COKES-ARE-ON-ME: Hey, gang -- Cokes are on me!

DR. ZOLAR: Seriously.

ATTN. PEAT: I lichen this to moss.

RECLUSE X'OR: I peanut buttered & I Shatnered.

OILY CUKE WARBLE: Ghana aftersauce.

COKES-ARE-ON-ME: Pie, Dr. Zolar?

DR. ZOLAR: Three point one four dot dot dot.

ATTN. PEAT: I lichen math jokes.

RECLUSE X'OR: Whadya mean, 'orchid pie' ?!

OILY CUKE WARBLE: Ghana aftersauce.

*********

Good News for Night Owls


1. Salad-a-Day Jon has another red cabbage special.

2A. No more 4 in th' morn corn.
2B. No more blue soda.

3. There's a butterfly in the chocolate milk.

4. (backpack full of weed & zines)